the rose and the great grandmother

Posted: August 10, 2010 in Uncategorized
Tags: , ,

she was just about 14 when her grandmother died. it was really her great grandmother and she was just crushed. so she decided to blame god. what a fuckup can religion be when it shrinks everything to a very direct cause and effect of the most natural, mundanes experiences of any living being. so she would tell me how much she hated god, and so on and i would think that maybe i should know something big to tell her, because i was her damned leader after all. but i could not come up with anything brilliant so i shut up and i knew that father bob was really listening because he didn’t know me and he wanted to check out if i would sound theologically correct.  i got mute out of painful self consciousness.  but hey, god is after all pretty good to those us that can see shit beyond the eye ball.  so i’m in the garden with her and she is ranting about her fucking great grandmother and we stopped in front of this really old rose bush: it is thick in the main stem and gets thinner as it grows wider.  some roses are fucking awesome, some are barely open and some are dropping to the ground, petals and seeds alike. so i turn to her and i say, there, there is your grandmother. do you rellay think that god is ruling from some fucking gold throne saying this rose will dye and this grandmother will die?  Do yoiu think that for a moment the other roses and not so open roses will suffer the absence of the old rose? Nah…  They don’t have self pity, or else, the perfune would not stay unchanged, they don’t go after blaming someone or something for the demise of their elders. so the old rose dies so that it can throuhg its seed down. without death of one state there is no birth of another.  so gets it, we walk away.  more grasshoppers that southern women and we feel alright.

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